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mxihockey

Depression

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Anyone here deal with this? I seem to have everything going well for me, good teammates, great billet family, getting paid to play, doing well in school, couldn't ask for more. But for some reason I just don't find myself being happy at all. I don't know what it is, maybe just the time of the year?

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Do you have someone trusted to talk to? A close friend perhaps? I find that it makes a lot of difference; it takes a lot off your chest.

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Find someone close to talk with and see if you unload anything, then see if you need a professional after that. There is such a thing as Seasonal Affective Disorder, aptly acronymed as SAD.

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I'm a longtime sufferer- I've been on a popular anti-depressant for years. Like Aireaye said, a close friend or trusted person makes a lot of difference. Also, Seasonal Depression is extremely common- try to get outdoors a little more to help with Vitamin D production in the winter because most people spend less time outdoors in the winter and it causes a deficiency which has been linked to seasonal depression. Keep your head high- you sound just like me; have the world by a stranglehold and just don't feel happy.

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Thanks a lot guys. Good to know I'm not the only one. Yea I'm actually pretty open about, I've talked to my parents about it, and they're aware. It's my first time being away from home. Some days I feel great, and some days not so much. Didn't know if I was just exaggerating things. That "seasonal affective disorder" seems like thats what it may be, but I never really experienced it until now.

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I've battled through depression, I've been diagnosed with social anxiety disorder, and I live in a city where in the winter it's dark when I get to work and dark when I leave (9 to 5). The best thing I've experienced that will help is talking with a psycho therapist, basically talking to someone. I have used depression medication, abused drugs and alcohol in the past, and the best thing was talking to a therapist. I would avoid talking with a friend, even a trusted friend, just to keep things separate and to get professional advice.

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I've battled through depression, I've been diagnosed with social anxiety disorder, and I live in a city where in the winter it's dark when I get to work and dark when I leave (9 to 5). The best thing I've experienced that will help is talking with a psycho therapist, basically talking to someone. I have used depression medication, abused drugs and alcohol in the past, and the best thing was talking to a therapist. I would avoid talking with a friend, even a trusted friend, just to keep things separate and to get professional advice.

That's unfortunate dude, glad to see you're battling. I know each of us has our own experiences and I'm not trying to put down yours, but I don't think it's good to avoid talking with a friend or two. A therapist isn't a friend but the help of someone who could've been through the same thing might do a similar job. However, not all of us have friends who are like that so I get where you're coming from in the end.

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The best thing about a therapist is that a good one just poses certain questions that get you talking and allow you to sort out your issues on your own as the discussion progresses. Totally objective, whereas a friend is likely to tell you what you want to hear. If they can just listen and let you talk, that would be better in my opinion. Avoid alcohol at all costs. It really messes with depression.

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You could ask your provider to see if they'd be willing to check your Vit D level. Pretty low-risk, low-cost intervention if they are. Add another vote for talking to a therapist, too. I've seen yoga help some people with depression and anxiety, too. Best of luck to you. Like others have said, I hope you feel better soon!

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Anyone here deal with this? I seem to have everything going well for me, good teammates, great billet family, getting paid to play, doing well in school, couldn't ask for more. But for some reason I just don't find myself being happy at all. I don't know what it is, maybe just the time of the year?

Sometimes that's the worst part of it - like any other illness, depression doesn't wait til you have a reason. I have a long history with manic/depression, anxiety and panic myself. I second the responses here - a good solid support network (trusted friends, people with similar experiences, a good therapist, medication if indicated, whatever you find works best with your personality and your particular situation) is the best thing to have. A good therapist (or an excellent friend) will be able to validate how you feel (acknowledge that you feel [x], not say 'oh, your life is great, you should be grateful/buck up and deal/etc') and help you get to the root of your depression, and figure out ways to mitigate and treat it. I can understand thinking maybe you don't want to talk to friends about it, there's a lot of stereotypes and biases around concerning depression and mental health. But it's about you being able to feel your best - not a whole lot unlike taking care of your physical self in order to play hockey.

Best of luck to you.

(and it's good to see so many supportive responses.)

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It always amazes me how many people seem to come out of the woodwork when the issue of depression/anxiety is mentioned. Lots of people deal with this but no one talks about it because of the mental illness stigma that needs to be eradicated. I have just begun to let my bosses know what I have to deal with on occasion and make no bones about saying that I won't be coming to work because I am having a particularly bad episode just like I wouldn't go to work if I had the flu.

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I suffer with bipolar depression and social anxiety disorder, it lead me down a very dark path because I kept it brewing and I tried to sweep it under the rug for much too long. Find people to talk to, not a significant other, but a friend or a coach, or a teacher. Talk to your doctor about anti depressant options, mine have caused me to gain weight, along with my drinking (worst thing you can do by the way) but the weight gain has been worth it, I also know people who haven't had any weight gain or any side effects. Seeing a therapist is something extremely helpful I find. Letting it out really helps, confronting your trigger if you have one is also something helpful. Private message me if you ever want to talk my friend.

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A question for those of you who have/are in the state : do you guys ever have 'triggers' that darken your mood? What I mean by that could be when one day you would feel OK, then a single relatively small/insignificant event would cause a downward spiral for a period (someone insults you, you make a mistake at work, get called out on something etc etc)

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A question for those of you who have/are in the state : do you guys ever have 'triggers' that darken your mood? What I mean by that could be when one day you would feel OK, then a single relatively small/insignificant event would cause a downward spiral for a period (someone insults you, you make a mistake at work, get called out on something etc etc)

Of course. I would say my trigger is loneliness. If I am by myself and have time to really think about things such as not being in any kind of a relationship at the moment, while all of my friends are (just an example), I can get down very, very quick. I lived alone this semster, and while it was nice at times, I got very lonely. I try to surround myself with friends as much as I can honestly. They screw with me because I am over their house so often, but they know about my struggles and welcome me. I couldn't ask for anymore than that.

I have been dealing with Depression and Anxiety issues since I was 11. Thankfully the worst of it is way past me now that I am 21 (Adolescence was absolute hell, and I truly mean that)

Keep your head up Mxi, everything is going to be alright. If I could get through what I got through, so can you :-)

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I have very similar triggers as Kovy71. I lived alone my first half semester of college and it almost killed me. I am moving in with my friend when I go back Monday. Having people flake on plans or people just bailing in general can also throw me into a total despair at times as well. I feel like it is very normal for people who suffer with clinical and bipolar depression to have things, even small things that can throw them in a slump.

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A question for those of you who have/are in the state : do you guys ever have 'triggers' that darken your mood? What I mean by that could be when one day you would feel OK, then a single relatively small/insignificant event would cause a downward spiral for a period (someone insults you, you make a mistake at work, get called out on something etc etc)

I definitely have a number of triggers for anxiety/panic. Sometimes even being out on the open ice does it, if I'm not distracting myself sufficiently. The anxieties tend to lead to depressive episodes because they are what would be overwise mundane things - taking the bus, going for a walk, etc - and the sense of incompetence and abnormality depresses me (e.g., "this is stupid, I should be able to do this, everyone else can do this, what's wrong with me?"). Other times, the depression has been a natural segue from the mania in bipolar depression. Burn out from the manic episode, crash into irritation, anger, depression.

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Some times it can be the simplest, seemingly insignificant things that can get you down. What I've started to do is try and find little things that bring you back up. When I began to look for things in life that made me happy, and started to appreciate the little interactions and observations on a daily basis, I found myself better equipped to make it through the times when that darkness comes over you.

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There have been studies that show that regular exercise actually increases serotonin production in the brain and acts as an anti-depressant (which regulate serotonin chemically). I find if I am active, I feel better more often than not.

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I agree with that. A lot of my episodes happened after I stopped playing hockey and a little bit when I stopped hitting the gym for travel hockey. If you take Ritalin I would suggest stopping and talking to your doctor as well. It increases dopamine in the brain so I started to abuse mine without really noticing I was abusing it.

Now I have a few questions for you guys. Do any of you guys feel like when you are off of meds you have destructive tendencies and when you are on meds you have the ultimate desire to stay away from destructive things? (alcohol for me)

Also for you fellow bipolars out there, when you are on a manic cycle do you sometimes find it very difficult to sleep at normal hours?

Lastly Do you ever cry tears of joy over little things that don't really call for it? That seemed to happen a lot for me.

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When I don't take my Prozac for 3 days straight, I do find myself to be irritable. Also, suffer from an anxiety complex where I believe that everyone is out to get me, whereas they might just be complimenting me when I'm off my meds. As for the 3rd, I rarely cry for any reason unless I've been smacked in the face which triggers a reflex to make me cry or unless there is severe depression in the entire room(i.e.: a funeral setting) but I do tend to get overjoyed at small things that don't call for it.

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Never stop the meds cold turkey. It messes you up in a major way. Don't drink with the meds either. Actually, avoiding drinking altogether is wise.

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Absolutely agree with jds about the exercise part (can't comment about the meds part, I wouldn't know). It's the worst without hockey...

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Trust me I don't drink with the meds or at all anymore. I am a reformed alcoholic, this is more of just stuff I have experienced as a whole. I never quit meds cold turkey I have forgotten them before. (ADHD makes me veryyyyy forgetful) I find if I don't take my citalopram (just one of the meds) I have a hard time talking to authority figures, or confronting issues.

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