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Chadd

The Venting Spot

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Sadly though, it was essentially in the same field. So the 10 years I spent doing what I've done here, did not pan out for a job.

... yet. Keep your head up, good things happen to good people.

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I feel myself becoming more aggressive and violent as each day passes.... I'm wondering if it has something to do with the anniversary of my grandma's death on the 28th.

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I feel myself becoming more aggressive and violent as each day passes.... I'm wondering if it has something to do with the anniversary of my grandma's death on the 28th.

That is a tough event for a lot of people. I wish you luck with having to deal with it, but I think if you focus on the beauty of her life, maybe that will help ease the situation? Stay positive!

My grandmother lived to be almost ninety, and then she got in an car accident while driving with my mom and was killed when someone ran a red light and tee-boned them. I nearly lost my mother as well. I was so pissed off for so long, and it ate me up inside thinking that someone screwed up and we all had to pay the price for it. It was a kid who was supposedly hung over and racing to a crappy job that he was late for. He barely got anything more than a slap on the wrist.

But now, about eight years later, I have to think that after all the things my grandmother faced in her life (surving stomach cancer and living with a colostomy bag being the biggest one), the irony of how she died makes me smile. She was gone in a instant and probably didn't know what hit her. She was a wonderful character to say the least, and I know she would have wanted me to remember her with a smile.

Here's hoping your pain passes. It's a phase, and it will go soon enough. Don't be afraid to get help if you think you need it. I did, and I am glad I did.

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Not to sound contradictory to your post Powerfibers (I completely agree with it by the way) but the kid who was driving would definitely have to live with the fact that he ended someone else's life due to his own preventable mistake; not just a slap on the wrist. It's probably just as hard on him as it was for others involved. However yes, it's definitely not fair that your family has to live with that, it's not fair but it's life.

Hang in there bostoncrimsonsox :)

Edited by AIREAYE

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I feel myself becoming more aggressive and violent as each day passes

Then you need to actively work on being more relaxed. Change habits, find things that calm you down or avoid being around the people that make you more hostile as much as possible. I used to be rage incarnate when I was in high school, I've mellowed quite a bit over the years, especially over the last couple. Some of it will happen with time, but you need to work on it as well.

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Not to sound contradictory to your post Powerfibers (I completely agree with it by the way) but the kid who was driving would definitely have to live with the fact that he ended someone else's life due to his own preventable mistake; not just a slap on the wrist. It's probably just as hard on him as it was for others involved. However yes, it's definitely not fair that your family has to live with that, it's not fair but it's life.

Hang in there bostoncrimsonsox :)

True, I agree. I just meant to imply that it gave no relief or satisfaction legally either. And really, how could it? Your post is spot on.

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aireaye, it wasn't a car accident... she was 82 and passed away as I was driving home from school the day after I played my 1st hockey game in HS and Senior Night in Football

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Sadly though, it was essentially in the same field. So the 10 years I spent doing what I've done here, did not pan out for a job.

....so far.

Whether you do or don't get a particular job is rarely - if ever - a measurement of anything but the chemistry you had with the particular peeps you met during the process. Let it go and just keep moving. Just like in a game good sir.

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aireaye, it wasn't a car accident... she was 82 and passed away as I was driving home from school the day after I played my 1st hockey game in HS and Senior Night in Football

I see, but I was referring to Powerfibers' post and his situation. My condolences out to both of you guys still; I watched my grandmother pass away this past January so I can sort of relate.

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Dear hockey monkey:

If you show an item in stock, actually stock that item. If you don't have an item, dont show you do. It's really not that hard!

Why is it so hard to find a good pair of skates?!

Edited by goaliemanshark

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Red light camera....I didn't realize the intersection had one. I didn't speed up or anything...just thought I'd beat the yellow. Not another car in sight.... just lights on timers. A quick google search tells me I can expect a $300 ticket in the mail soon. Yeah me!

So, after work today...I stopped in at a tattoo shop and booked an appointment for next week to get new ink. Get home and check the mail...That red light ticket, i hoped I dodged....yeah...I didn't! $325. Now I gotta re-think the tat! Crap!!!

So options. 1. Plead Guilty...pay it. 2. Plead Not Guilt and go to trial (not an option...I'm dead to rights done on it) 3. Plead Guilty.... but ask for a reduced fine.

Has anyone ever done this (successfully) and is this being the first offense on an 18 year clean record worth taking the half day off work?

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Two considerations come immediately to mind:

1. Where did this occur, and what options are normally offered? Where I live, for example, there are situations where you can get off with a fine, but won't have a conviction on your record.

2. How do the economics work for you? Loss of a half day's pay and a lower fine vs. a higher fine, and the change in insurance rates each way.

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wrangler,

I'm in Hamilton, Ontario. Those are the options laid out on the notice. The tickets/conviction carries no demerit points, so I can only assume (and hope) that my insurance will not be affected...and as far as the day off work...I've got lots of vacation time left...so I'd just book it as a half day off...so that is not an issue.

I've got a message to a friend at work who's husband is a Cop...I'll see what he says.

[EDIT]: Upon a quick Google search, and assuming nothing has changed in Ontario in the last 2 years...because these traffic cams only identify the vehicle and not the licence of the driver...it is not applied to the driving record and does not affect insurance! Phew!!!!

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Sorry, my ignorance of Canadian law is overwhelming. My only exposure to it is here.

Regarding the economics, vacation time won't affect current cash flow, but it's worth money, too -- wouldn't they have to pay you for it at retirement or termination?

Good luck.

Edited by wrangler

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wrangler,

I'm in Hamilton, Ontario. Those are the options laid out on the notice. The tickets/conviction carries no demerit points, so I can only assume (and hope) that my insurance will not be affected...and as far as the day off work...I've got lots of vacation time left...so I'd just book it as a half day off...so that is not an issue.

I've got a message to a friend at work who's husband is a Cop...I'll see what he says.

[EDIT]: Upon a quick Google search, and assuming nothing has changed in Ontario in the last 2 years...because these traffic cams only identify the vehicle and not the licence of the driver...it is not applied to the driving record and does not affect insurance! Phew!!!!

It has nothing to do with safety, it's just a money grab. I saw a recent study that showed accident rates were up at every one of the surveyed locations after cameras were installed.

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It has nothing to do with safety, it's just a money grab. I saw a recent study that showed accident rates were up at every one of the surveyed locations after cameras were installed.

Haha...love the money grab argument.

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Well...the ticket itself is 'only' $260. I can live with that. You break a law...you have to pay! It's the "victim fine surcharge and other fees" that scream cash grab to me!

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Well...the ticket itself is 'only' $260. I can live with that. You break a law...you have to pay! It's the "victim fine surcharge and other fees" that scream cash grab to me!

The VFS is supposed to go directly in to programs designed to help, support and compensate victims of crime rather than the government coffers. Think of it as a charitable donation.

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It has nothing to do with safety, it's just a money grab. I saw a recent study that showed accident rates were up at every one of the surveyed locations after cameras were installed.

Yep! People slamming on their brakes at a yellow, when they normally just go through it. From what I've heard, police hate RLCs.

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After a complete relapse with alcohol addiction, I really find it hard to want to continue living. Prescribed anti depressants didn't work, neither did therapy. Just don't really see the point anymore as selfish as it is.

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Starsfan, you've just GOT to keep fighting through this. There's no easy solution, but if you keep pushing and keep pushing, there's something better coming along the other side. Stay with therapy, make connections to other people, TALK about it. C'mon dude, we're all pulling for you; just gotta keep going.

I know it's hard over an online forum to convey this, but I mean every word dude. KEEP GOING !

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