Getting hitched..

[BK 0]

So I am getting hitched a week from Saturday.. Any words of advice?

[LegoDoom 0]

Don't do it.

[ktang 34]

Congratulations!

- Keep your hockey equipment purchases to a minimum.

- It takes her half an hour to get ready to get ready.

- There is no correct answer to "do these make me look fat?", "which outfit looks better?", or "is she pretty?"

[BK 0]

:lol:

- It takes her half an hour to get ready to get ready.

This is classic.. It takes her 45 minutes (on average) to get ready to go out..

It takes her 15 minutes to gear up for drop-in :D

[pantherfan 0]

Congratulations! :D

[UMWhockey 0]

:lol:

- It takes her half an hour to get ready to get ready.

This is classic.. It takes her 45 minutes (on average) to get ready to go out..

It takes her 15 minutes to gear up for drop-in :D

well since she plays hockey, just remember that for every peice of new equipment you buy, you have to buy her something of equal or greater value....

[BK 0]

:lol:

- It takes her half an hour to get ready to get ready.

This is classic.. It takes her 45 minutes (on average) to get ready to go out..

It takes her 15 minutes to gear up for drop-in :D

well since she plays hockey, just remember that for every peice of new equipment you buy, you have to buy her something of equal or greater value....

I just found that out. I got an Ultralite shaft off of epucks sale. I got it a few days ago and the first thing she said was "how come you didn't order me one".. I was afraid to let her feel how lite the shaft was because I thought she would beat me over the head with it. Her B-day is coming soon and I want to get her in a new pair of skates. She wears itechs right now.

[hockeysew 0]

:P First and foremost, make sure that you are marrying your best friend

Be prepared to WORK at a successful marriage.

We have been married for 19 years and a marriage is an ever evolving entity with constant change. You have to be able to roll with the changes that life throws at you.( I was gonna say roll with the punches but.... :D )

So many people talk about "what I want". You have to lose that mindset and focus on "what WE want"

Remember-Peaks and Valleys

You have to be willing to give more than you take.

You have to make sure you set aside time for the 2 of you as well as your own time. (Remember,this is what made you fall in love to start)

Remind her every once in a while that SHE is the most important and sexiest person in your life.

Learn when to speak but more importantly, learn when to shut up! (Critical at certain hormonal times-you'll figure it out)

If your pissed, take the time to chill out before you open your mouth and say something you wish you hadn't.

Have a joint bank account but also each one of you maintain your own "goodie account" AND BE HONEST TO EACH OTHER ABOUT IT!! (In talking with my peers that have gotten divorced-this and infidelity are the 2 things that will destroy a marriage quicker than anything.)

Bring her home a few Roses once in a while for no reason at all.

If you think about F@#king around on her, consider the point of is it worth losing what you have? (Probably not-its saved my ass and marriage)

If you think the grass is greener on the other side o' the fence remember, the same dog craps over there too......

Anybody involved in a long term relationship will wonder what being with someone else would be like-its human nature-Its what you do with those thoughts that counts!!

Make sure to have fun along the way

Getting married was one of the best things I have ever done

CONGRATS!!!!

[hip check 0]

Congratulations, first of all.

If you really want to make it work over the long haul, learn how she gives and receives love.

Some people need words of affirmation, some need gifts (not small, not large - just to know you were thinking of them), others need affection or touch, still others need things done for them (wash dishes, iron laundry, mow the lawn, fix the broken...). You should get the picture...

You will learn quickly, if you pay attention, what her form is. If you can meet that need in her - and in turn she in you - the relationship will be solid for years. That's the best advice I've ever been given. I know it works.

Also remember, marriage is a commitment, not a contract. Live up to your commitment regardless of what she does. Too many people don't take their vows seriously.

Shoot, I'm gonna start sounding like Dr. Phil soon! :( I'm done.

[hockeysew 0]

Congratulations, first of all.

If you really want to make it work over the long haul, learn how she gives and receives love.

Some people need words of affirmation, some need gifts (not small, not large - just to know you were thinking of them), others need affection or touch, still others need things done for them (wash dishes, iron laundry, mow the lawn, fix the broken...). You should get the picture...

You will learn quickly, if you pay attention, what her form is. If you can meet that need in her - and in turn she in you - the relationship will be solid for years. That's the best advice I've ever been given. I know it works.

Also remember, marriage is a commitment, not a contract. Live up to your commitment regardless of what she does. Too many people don't take their vows seriously.

Shoot, I'm gonna start sounding like Dr. Phil soon! :( I'm done.

Gawd if this was Dr Phil I dont wanna know what mine came off like :D

Now if we could only do the Dr Drew version................................

Congrats again

But now you have to be a good Kitty B)

[mack 44]

Congrats. You'll probably feel like puking for a bit beforehand, but that'll pass. Oh, don't let your best man get more drunk than you at the bachelor party either.

[BK 0]

:P First and foremost, make sure that you are marrying your best friend

Be prepared to WORK at a successful marriage.

We have been married for 19 years and a marriage is an ever evolving entity with constant change. You have to be able to roll with the changes that life throws at you.( I was gonna say roll with the punches but.... )

So many people talk about "what I want". You have to lose that mindset and focus on "what WE want"

Remember-Peaks and Valleys

You have to be willing to give more than you take.

You have to make sure you set aside time for the 2 of you as well as your own time. (Remember,this is what made you fall in love to start)

Remind her every once in a while that SHE is the most important and sexiest person in your life.

Learn when to speak but more importantly, learn when to shut up! (Critical at certain hormonal times-you'll figure it out)

If your pissed, take the time to chill out before you open your mouth and say something you wish you hadn't.

Have a joint bank account but also each one of you maintain your own "goodie account" AND BE HONEST TO EACH OTHER ABOUT IT!! (In talking with my peers that have gotten divorced-this and infidelity are the 2 things that will destroy a marriage quicker than anything.)

Bring her home a few Roses once in a while for no reason at all.

If you think about F@#king around on her, consider the point of is it worth losing what you have? (Probably not-its saved my ass and marriage)

If you think the grass is greener on the other side o' the fence remember, the same dog craps over there too......

Anybody involved in a long term relationship will wonder what being with someone else would be like-its human nature-Its what you do with those thoughts that counts!!

Make sure to have fun along the way

Getting married was one of the best things I have ever done

CONGRATS!!!!

EDITED: (Hockeysew is not a girl.. whoops :S)

After reading it, I am honestly going to grab her a few roses on the way home.. thats a really good idea. She has been a little ill lately so I think this will brighten her up a bit.

Thank you for the advice.

[hockeysew 0]

Not a problem there Kitty

:o BUT I NEED TO TELL YOU I AM THE BEST HUNG FEMALE YOU WILL EVER SEE!!

at least your not the only one that somebody thought was a chickie poo!

[domileafs28 0]

well whenever you snap an OPS you could give it to her and tell her "i saw this shaft at the LHS and i thought of you"

[BK 0]

Not a problem there Kitty

:o BUT I NEED TO TELL YOU I AM THE BEST HUNG FEMALE YOU WILL EVER SEE!!

at least your not the only one that somebody thought was a chickie poo!

I get it a lot to... see my sig.

Domi:

Shes not an idiot.. she has been playing hockey for about 3 years now.

[hockeysew 0]

well whenever you snap an OPS you could give it to her and tell her "i saw this shaft at the LHS and i thought of you"

Try that and you will discover the meaning of "Getting the shaft!!"

Honestly Badkitty

One of the small little touches such as roses or doing the dishes for her means more to a lady than going out a spending a whoop o' cash on her........

If it doesnt then is this really the person for you??

[BK 0]

She notices the little things more than the big things.. She works in a warehouse and is on her feet all day long. I used to give her a foot rub every night, but since then have gotten really busy with work. She kind of brought it up and asked why I didn't do it anymore.. I completely forgot that I did. Ever since then, I have been trying to do something nice for her every day.

[pantherfan 0]

Hey and if it doesn't work out you could always click Here

[hockeymom 2]

Congratulations Bad Kitty!

Want some words from the "other species"? With one caveat: I'm an expert in what doesn't work and, without bitterness, have no desire to ever go down that road again.

So, my first and best piece of advise is listen to Ktang, Hockysew and (when he eventually wades in here as I'm sure he will) gman. You get a sense of who people are from their posts and these are emotionally centered men whose love for and security with their wives just shines. (Sorry if I've just embarrassed you and puh-lease no one misinterpret that). (BTW ...Hipcheck, your advise was spot-on, I just haven't bumped up against your posts to the same degree).

Here's my laundry-list of cheap advise; try it on like a jacket, if it fits, wear it: if it doesn't, promptly discard it and walk away.

• make sure a priority is carving time for each other - life will be busy and it's all too easy to let this critical one slide (especially if you have kids).

• SHARE your lives - otherwise you'll wake up one day and be roommates & then why bother? It's now three entities you need to care for...you, her and us.

• Keep your own friends and activities as well as shared ones - if everything is shared there will be nothing left to talk about. Make sure you BOTH do this: your friends are the river that nourish you.

• Laugh - a really good barometer of how things are going.

• Learn how to fight in a healthy manner - I could write a book on this one! (not fighting usually means it has gone underground - not that there isn't a problem). If you're not fighting healthy - get help early on to learn the skillset...

• Keep a vigilant eye on resentments - the fight might be over but resentment can linger and build up - it is deadly.

• If you ever think you are going to stray, break up first. This is the most soul destroying thing one human being can do to another they supposedly love.

• When in doubt, stop and ask - "what do you need?" (at any time, but good in a disagreement or grrump moment). Does some amazing things: 1. shows you care about her and her needs, 2. you suddenly do not have to mind-read 3. she might know or not know what she needs, but it'll shift the conversation into solutions.

• Yep. Absolutely no correct answer and a potential minefield to "do I look fat in these?" I can help you out with this one!!! From a woman's perspective, if the Q is being asked, she already KNOWS she does!!!!! Guys always answer the wrong Q!!!! So you have to ask or figure out the real question. The REAL Q is something like this: "I look fat, do you still love me?" or variation: "Can I get away with this in public?" or variation "will you mind if I take MORE time and go change?" BTW: a way to get out of this Q is, "since you're asking the Q I don't think YOU"RE happy with how you look, so (end with appropriate variation) BTW 2: you can't duck this one with "fine" - remember, she knows she looks fat, so you've just said you are lying to her or have no judgement!!

• NEVER suggest it is PMS (even when it is) or you'll be one dead kitty!! The issue here is it deflates any legitimacy to the point she is making. How dismissive! It is ALWAYS a valid thought/emotion - it is just amplified a titch.

• Say I love you at unusual times and in unusual ways. Be imaginative. (if you buy flowers, do the "work" of it and put them in a vase). Write "this is the woman I love" on the bathroom mirror in lipstick (not her favorite one tho') do the same with "Happy Birthday"..."I love you" at Valentine's....you get the idea. The little surprises are absolutely the BEST.

Wishing you great joy Bad Kitty!

[Chadd 916]

• Yep. Absolutely no correct answer and a potential minefield to "do I look fat in these?" I can help you out with this one!!! From a woman's perspective, if the Q is being asked, she already KNOWS she does!!!!! Guys always answer the wrong Q!!!! So you have to ask or figure out the real question. The REAL Q is something like this: "I look fat, do you still love me?" or variation: "Can I get away with this in public?" or variation "will you mind if I take MORE time and go change?" BTW: a way to get out of this Q is, "since you're asking the Q I don't think YOU"RE happy with how you look, so (end with appropriate variation) BTW 2: you can't duck this one with "fine" - remember, she knows she looks fat, so you've just said you are lying to her or have no judgement!!

Tell me about it. I had to go shopping with my wife last week and got that question more than a few times.

[BK 0]

hockeymom,

thanks for the suggestions. Im sure I will use them and they "fit" quite well. Thank you.

[freq019 0]

congrats BK

Its the best adventure in life and I wouldn't trade it for the world.

[HotBacon 0]

I just got hitched last Saturday, so my advice is only a few days old:

- Enjoy the day and drink in every minute of it. Take as many pictures and videos as you can, and don't worry about looking stupid. Have as much fun as possible because it's a huge day that goes way to fast.

(although since we were in Vegas this info may be a little different than a couple that has a 2 hour wedding and 6 hour reception :D )

[BK 0]

Were getting married in Washington and having our honeymoon on the OR coast :) I imagine I will take a ton of pictures.

[Tricky4L 0]

The OR coast??? I'm from Portland and have been to the coast many many times... but I still contend that I have only been to a beach when I'm on the east coast. Good choice though if you're getting a cabin/house type situation. Good luck with the wedding and this ultimate life adventure... Getting hitched to a hockey chick is a rare find, way to go.