how to make a girl friend?

[Aussie Joe 0]

$$$ JACKPOT! $$$

on my backup plan

See now there's a valuble lesson, if she's wasting your time then move onto something more viable. In this case your back up girl is probably more of a winner maybe then you think. Like look at Jim from American Pie, he ended up with his back up girl who BTW is a freak'n nympho. Winners all around I think. ;-)

[mack 44]

$$$ JACKPOT! $$$

on my backup plan

See now there's a valuble lesson, if she's wasting your time then move onto something more viable. In this case your back up girl is probably more of a winner maybe then you think. Like look at Jim from American Pie, he ended up with his back up girl who BTW is a freak'n nympho. Winners all around I think. ;-)

Except that Nadia still looks hot and the chick who plays his wife looks like Berries and Creme from Starburst.

[Clark12 0]

Woah, this thread makes me feel a hell of alot better about not getting any for the past month.

Thanks blueliner :D

[Aussie Joe 0]

Except that Nadia still looks hot and the chick who plays his wife looks like Berries and Creme from Starburst.

And yet both have gone onto illustrious acting careers, although Im sure Shannon Elizabeth still confuses Puppies with politics. ;)

[shifter 0]

haha anything new??

[D3nZ 0]

Best way to get a girl is probably by not trying to understand them cause you never will (Men are from Mars, Woman from Venus). Personally I'm not shy and I'm single so, my advice to you is just wait, go out, have fun with friends, get noticed by them and you don't really have to get a girlfriend right away, maybe get a couple of girl friends who you can hang out with once in a while. They will talk to friends and their friends will talk to their friends and so on.

[thejackal 46]

try getting a job as a salesman (sportschek or something like that). you get to start conversations and talk with loads of strangers everyday.

[blueliner27 12]

I guess this is my first "date".

I took her out for a dinner (this wasn't planned) to a quite Japanese resturant. I didn't talk anything about the grad but courses and teachers.

I never had this kinda opportunity. I was damn shy that I hardly looked at her face and gave an eye contect.

Positives

+ I didn't say any word mumbling.

+ She liked it (I guess).

Negatives

- I wasn't confident.

- No proper eye contect made.

Any comments?

[LkptTiger 1]

Flirt, flirt, flirt and flirt some more. Who really cares if you crash and burn? Pretty soon you'll have things pretty well figured out and it will become more of a game rather than a nerve-racking experience.

Personally, I've had a girlfriend for about three years now, but I still flirt with other girls a lot. First of all, I want to stay on top of my game/keep my options open in case something happens in the relationship (hey, it's not like I'm physically cheating on her - and I don't think I ever will - and it's not like we're married). Secondly, it's just fun.

The guys who lack confidence are the guys who feel like they have to make some elaborate effort to break the ice. You have to keep it relatively simple.

Example - there is this girl in my Geology lecture who I noticed was making it a habit of occasionally glancing at me during the first few days of class (I noticed this because I had made it a habit of making the occasional glance in her direction...you know how it works). Real good-looking girl. I got the impression she was attracted to me, and I was definitely attracted to her - and I'm pretty sure she had a similar thought process. Eventually, there was one day when it "just so happened" that I ended-up walking into the lecture hall behind her and, boom, sitting right next to her (there's about 200 other kids in the class - she didn't know anyone, I didn't know anyone; neither of us had people we sat with every day).

About half-way through class, I started flipping-through my folder and notebook and eventually muttered "Fuck!" under my breath. She looked over and asked me what was wrong (jackpot). I told her that I had mis-placed an assignment hand-out that had been given to us during the previous lecture (which was a lie), and then asked her if she might be able to make a photocopy for me.

She said she could do that - that we could both go to the library right after class and print one out then. I interpreted this as an invitation for advance, since, had she not been interested in me, she probably would have just told me that I could just as easily print one from the "Course Documents" section of the class website.

If you're not into the whole "Hi, my name is _______. What's yours?" approach, this is the way to do it. It's simple, it's short (although I realize my description was rather long-winded) and really pretty safe - you're not going to look like an ass when you don't get the answer you were looking for, because, as far as anyone else knows, you weren't looking for a specific answer. All I said was "Fuck. I think I lost the assignment. If it's not too much trouble, you think you could bail me out and print-up a copy of yours for me sometime?" I'm in. If I didn't have a girlfriend, she and I would probably have gotten physical by now. As it is now, I see her on campus just about every day and our conversations serve as my source of entertainment whenever I am missing life as a single guy.

[mack 44]

I guess this is my first "date".

I took her out for a dinner (this wasn't planned) to a quite Japanese resturant. I didn't talk anything about the grad but courses and teachers.

I never had this kinda opportunity. I was damn shy that I hardly looked at her face and gave an eye contect.

Positives

+ I didn't say any word mumbling.

+ She liked it (I guess).

Negatives

- I wasn't confident.

- No proper eye contect made.

Any comments?

This doesn't sound bad at all, especially if it's actually your first-ever date. If you get that nervous feeling like you need to talk; don't. Let her talk and she's a girl so that'll come naturally. Work on the eye contact thing though, that's definitely something you gotta make.

[shifter 0]

good job man! keep it up ! :D

[Fire0nIce228 1]

Lkpt sounds like he's the man.

For a first date it sounds like you did alright, but man, your putting it on a pedastool. I know, I know, at first a girl is freakin awesome, but eventually they'll come stab ya in the back. Now don't get me wrong, one day you'll probably find the girl you'll be with forever that won't stab you in the back, but chances are the first few chicks you meet arn't going to be that girl. This is the time to just figure it all out, and thennnn you can find 'the one'.

I've learned from my past that girls can be heartbreakers. I re-evaluated the things I was doing to get girls, and realized that I was constantly going out of my way and above my means to get there attention or make them think I'm a good boyfriend. (Maybe a lack of confidence thing like Lkpt said, I don't think I am with girls) So recently, with the girl I was dating for the past few weeks (told her it wasn't working out two days ago) I made an effort to just be normal. I didn't take her out to eat 2 or 3 times a week or show up with flowers one day just because like I had with girls of the past. She still liked me, but it turns out for the first time I was the one to end a relationship because I just wasn't feeling it. I don't know if my attitude has changed and I've gained confidence, or I've just reached the point where I don't give a shit?

I guess I got myself into the mindset that I've just gotta be me, and if I want to stay at home and watch tv or go play hockey or do whatever I'm going to do it rather than throw all that aside for a gf all the time, and if she doesn't like it then thats too bad. My main point is that you have to be yourself. I think we can agree that you want to be with a girl who likes you for who you are rather than a girl who likes you for whom you've projected yourself to be, so don't fake it! I can understand that its nerveracking to be in a 1 on 1 with a girl, but keep in mind that if she doesnt like you for who you are there is gonna be plenty out there who probably will, and you won't have to put up any facades.

edit: Although they do appreciate dinner and flowers etc. on occasion. And you'll appreciate the piece afterwards.

[Ti-girl 0]

Honestly, you'll get better.

My boyfriend is painfully shy, to the point that I thought that he was an arrogant asshole when I first met him because he never spoke to me. Ever. Then I found out that he got tongue tied whenever he got around me. His best friend asked me out for him.

Started off slow, he couldn't look me in the eye...but hey it's been almost 4 years now.

[LkptTiger 1]

Lkpt sounds like he's the man.

If I were "the man," I wouldn't be stuck with a long-term girlfriend, here ;)

"The Man"? No, not at all. I have three things going for me: I really enjoy talking to attractive women (though conversation with females can sometimes be mind-numbingly awful), I'm usually a pretty good at telling people what they want to hear, and I have a way with words.

It's not a matter of being "the man" or not (at least not for me). It's just a matter of having the resolve to actually initiate contact with women. I think I might remember a time when girls intimidated me a little bit...but I also remember a vacation a few years back when I approached every attractive middle-school aged girl I saw (don't worry...I was in middle school, too). I went from "mildly awkward" to "good" to "natural."

I'm not sure if there are guys out there who are born to be good at talking to girls, but if there are, I can tell you I sure as Hell was not one of them.

[Fire0nIce228 1]

Walking up and talking to a rando is not something I can do. I can join in a conversation at the bar or party or whatever and meet/talk to women that way. Your an English major right? That might help with the talking and stuff I'm sure you've done plenty of talks in front of a class etc.

The girl I just broke up with walked up to me and just started talking to me, scared the hell outta me!

I think the main problem now is I can't tell if a girl is 16 or 26 half of the time!

Oh, sorry about the g/f too ;) Haha

[LkptTiger 1]

Believe me, buddy - girls like it when you single them out and approach them. If they're attracted to you, they will sit and wait for you to make the first move. If you do, beautiful. If not, there's probably another guy who will. You don't necessarily have to be Don Juan, and the conversation doesn't have to get personal - just keep things flowing and you'll be alright.

[M-Cohen 0]

I agree with Lkpt... Even the simplest of questions can get things flowing. For instance, "what are you drinking tonight" can lead to drinks you like, she likes, etc. Thus you two talking, and if it works out more then nice. If not, ahh well.

To the OP. The date sounds pretty good, eye contact is definetly something to work on though, and remember for future dates. Doesn't have to be dinner, alot of the time if you think of something novel or just simple (ice skating?) then that may be appreciated just as much, if not more then the simple Dinner and a movie.

[bdj 0]

I find skating dates to be boring, mostly because the girls I have done them with can hardly skate and I have to babysit them the whole time.

EDIT: Although my last girlfriend played hockey and I liked that. I would have liked to get on the ice with her a couple times but I dropped her like a bad habit so doesn't look like thats going to happen.

[M-Cohen 0]

From my experience skating dates are the best when the girl can't skate.. For a few reasons, first the think your an amazing skater. And being amazing is great no matter what, and 2nd that their falling and crap so it's all close physical contact that isn't all weird and creepy...

[Fire0nIce228 1]

From my experience skating dates are the best when the girl can't skate.. For a few reasons, first the think your an amazing skater. And being amazing is great no matter what, and 2nd that their falling and crap so it's all close physical contact that isn't all weird and creepy...

x2

[Jason Harris 31]

Flirt, flirt, flirt and flirt some more. Who really cares if you crash and burn?

That's so true.

When I had my first girlfriend, I learned that I was much more flirtatious when I was in a committed relationship, since it didn't matter to me what the girl thought -- I was just flirting. However, it turned out that most women responded positively to the flirting. If you think about it, I was paying attention to them and I came across as confident, since I was saying things that I probably wouldn't have said if I was worried about turning the girl off.

So learn how to flirt, which is often just gentle teasing, and do it when it flows naturally. Someone mentioned just walking up to a girl and asking what's she's drinking. Everybody's different, but I never liked that, because you're putting yourself on audition; i.e., I'll give you twenty seconds to impress me. However, if you have the opportunity to see the girl in a less forced setting, a flirtatious comment might easily flow out of the circumstances.

[CNTbreath 0]

Blueliner27: One more reason that I become D is that I suck at 1 on 1

Seems like you have this problem in many aspects of your life.

[cougarkiller98 0]

couldn't have said it any better.

[blueliner27 12]

From my experience skating dates are the best when the girl can't skate.. For a few reasons, first the think your an amazing skater. And being amazing is great no matter what, and 2nd that their falling and crap so it's all close physical contact that isn't all weird and creepy...

Humm... you know what? I thought about that too.

Thanks for all inputs guys!

[JR Boucicaut 3803]

couldn't have said it any better.

Haha Roces Big Cat...