Do You Ever Hate Hockey?

[jds 20]

Came back from my regular game of shinny with a bunch of guys who have been playing all their lives unlike me (started at 43. I'm 46 now). Since I am new to playing the game I always expect to be one of if not the weakest players on the ice. I didn't care because it was too much fun just to be out there. But lately, I have started to get frustrated with my lack of ability. Tonight I couldn't do anything right. That used to be fine with me because I figured I was still learning and I still know I am but sometimes it really sucks when you are shite. This has happened a couple of times this year to the point where I am leaving the rink miserable and think maybe I should just pack in the competitive game and stick to just tooling around at stick and pucks. Why continue to be frustrated?I wonder if I am just wasting my time trying to make up for decades of not playing. Did I bite off more than I can chew? Anyone else in my shoes (old, new to the game and crappy)have these mental slumps? If so can you please tell me how to fix my head so I can return to the shit-eating grin I had for the first two years every time I was in a game? Thanks. Now I will go feel sorry for myself offline.

[SirJW 207]

Join a lower level team you will have more fun.

[McDougalfaschnitzer 32]

Most of my frustrations with hockey stem from the attitudes of others, especially when dealing with certain parents and players.

I'm not in your situation but having a good time is the name of the game, so I say try to get back into that rhythm of fun. Honestly, who cares if you do very poorly. Set some personal goals that aren't extremely demanding (no need to go right for the cup), and work little by little. Focus on steps forward :)

[sickwilly 37]

Yes, but it never lasts all that long. Sometimes taking a night off or a week of can be all that it takes to get back into it. Sometimes, there's a lot more BS in our league than there needs to be. Playing a little less in the league and a little more at shinny has made it a bit more enjoyable.

Hope you're feeling better soon!

[Chadd 916]

Sure. Between the sandbagging, cheap shots and even assholes on my own team every once in a while, I've been burned out on hockey a few times. Add in spending a few hours here every night dealing with the rule violations and disciplinary action and I need to get away from it all and forget about the sport and all that comes with it.

As for the frustration with your level of play, I can understand that too. I'm playing less often now than I ever have since I first put on skates. Part of that is from the factors listed above, some is work related and some is from my concussion, and now ankle problems. Not being able to do things I want to do, or used to do, is frustrating. Then I sit back and remember that I'm not playing three or four times a week and working with pro and amateur coaches on my weaknesses anymore. I just can't have high expectations of my play right now. I tend to make safe, simple plays and make the game as easy on myself as possible. I focus on not making mistakes and doing the best I can with what I have at the moment. Not glamorous, but it's reality. My enjoyment of the game comes from hanging out with the friends I've made over the years and sharing something we all enjoy.

[nickerjones 8]

I am in the same situation just a few years younger. I am 28 and I started skating in March -April. I put together a team of beginners and we began to play. I for the most part enjoyed it but being above average in 3 sports growing up I though I would catch on quicker than I am. I am still a poor skater and it sucks. Really I still dont mind falling but there is a team in our league that if you run into them they get pissed. I am talking bout , I ran into a guy and their team captain came off the bench and attacked me from behind. One of my other guys did it and the guy just started throwing punches.

The problem with this is its a team of people that work at the rink so there are no disciplinary actions taken against this team. Its the only league in the city so our options are limited.

I hate every time we are scheduled to play this team. I absolutely hate hockey after we play them .

[pby 0]

I think its unrealistic to expect yourself to play at same level as the people who have been playing all their lives in such a short time. I know I get really frustrated at myself when people skate circles around me and theres nothing I can do about it. I'd say keep at it and don't get deterred by your playing ability because if you know you're giving everything you've got, you should at least get some sort of satisfaction from trying.

Like SirJW said, you could try play with people of similar abilites/experience to rebuild your confidence. Alternatively you could try attend some hockey clinic/camp for adults. I attended a few before and found it helpful in keeping myself motivated.

In the end, its a game and if you're not enjoying yourself theres little reasons to force yourself to play.

[Leb_CRX 0]

I think when you set expectations for yourself, and fall short, you get frustrated

other times, it's players maybe shaking their heads, or saying stuff, or you thinking they are upset that may make you frustrated

I get frustrated when I shouldn't way too often...and when I think back on why, it's always cause I feel I let myself or someone else down..realizing hockey is full of bad bounces, and things not going how you want them most of the time, life goes on

I think to have more fun, play with guys your own skill level, have no expectations, and just enjoy being out there...that's what I been focusing on...and don't have expectations, just cause you got x assists and x goals the last game and dangled around buddy 4 times doesn't mean you're going to touch the puck, sad reality

[jds 20]

In the end, its a game and if you're not enjoying yourself theres little reasons to force yourself to play.

Exactly. It's difficult to lose the passion that I have had for the last three years playing any chance I could. I am wondering if the passion was for the pursuit of skill rather than the actual playing. I love practising-never get frustrated there. I know it sounds like I'm whining but that is not the case. I don't expect to play as well as guys who have years of experience on me. The frustration comes from the plateau in my skill level I suspect. Just wondering if getting frustrated is commonplace with the highly skilled guys. More just generating a discussion.

[Cams 7]

I ran into that rut before. Most of it stemmed from a Sunday AM rec league where the I ran sucked (which was fine, great bunch of guys), but in-fighting amongst certain team mates, and as well as playing against a team of former Jr. B/C buddies who wanted nothing more than to run up the score and goon it up every game. It was not something me or my team looked forward, plus the next year half my team jumped ship at the last minute without letting me know, and I ended up with a concussion from some "hero" on another team. At this point it was more of a chore than going to have fun. That pretty much was the end of my rec league days, and now it's just pick-up or recently gotten back into the rec-league (co-ed). I did take most of this summer off too. Now I am re-energized and ready to play (financially not so yet), but sometimes you just need time away and to reset.

I think everyone has run into a "I hate hockey" phase, or at least a break from it.

[Chadd 916]

Exactly. It's difficult to lose the passion that I have had for the last three years playing any chance I could.

Sometimes you just need to some time away to appreciate it and start enjoying it again. Anything you do too much will burn you out.

[iceNsteel 0]

I went through a "I hate hockey" phase a few years ago. The solution for me was just getting out of the beer leagues, I haven't looked back. Nor have I had any burn out on hockey sense then. I was sick of the 11 PM games at a rink 40 miles from my house, I was sick of the guys that were trying to recapture their glory days. I was sick of paying what came out to $22 per game for what amounted to a 51 minute game, which with two periods of run time was maybe 25 minutes of ice time on good night. I was sick of the in fighting on the teams I played on. I was sick of the guys that felt we needed $150 per sweater jerseys to play beer league hockey and acted like you were Scrooge himself if you didn't want to pay it.

Some people need the league, the refs, keeping score, and all that jazz. I had my competitive hockey days, and I'm okay with that being over. Now I just want to play for the love of the game, and while drop-in is not without its problems, it works for me. Sounds to me like you haven't found what works for you yet. Like other people have said, maybe find a team or a skate with a lower skill level. I think you'd have more fun if you were a bigger part of the game as it was being played.

[MTG35 0]

The frustration comes from the plateau in my skill level I suspect. Just wondering if getting frustrated is commonplace with the highly skilled guys. More just generating a discussion.

I would say that is it more than anything. In the beginning we all make big improvements almost everytime we step on the ice, especially if you are diligent about practice. That keeps the passion going and the smiles big. Then those improvements slow down or seem to stop all together. You still practice and/or play just as much but don't see the gains you used to. Then the frustration starts. So from there it would seem that an adjustment in expectations is in order. Focus on a couple of things to get better and look for the small improvements that can come from it.

Compare it to weight training. It can take only a year or so to go from benching 135 to over 200. But to get from 200 to say 225 may take another year. The progress slows down a lot as you reach your bodies natural potential. Then the work is harder and the results come slower.

I know exactly what you are going through as I have dealt with it many times myself in many different sports and activities.

[jds 20]

Compare it to weight training. It can take only a year or so to go from benching 135 to over 200. But to get from 200 to say 225 may take another year. The progress slows down a lot as you reach your bodies natural potential. Then the work is harder and the results come slower.

200?! Damnit! I suck at that too!

;)

[RadioGaGa 162]

I leave the ice frustrated with how I played from time to time...but to say I "hate" hockey would take one hell of an awful experience!

[IniNew 53]

I hate hockey when I have to break up a fight between to I-Leaguers. It's embarrassing.

[shooter27 116]

I think when you set expectations for yourself, and fall short, you get frustrated

I would completely agree with this statement. I went through the same thing at one point during college. My Sophomore and Junior years I went through a terrible slump - at one point I went something like 30 games without a goal. Then, after finally scoring, I went another 10 or so games before my next one. This was after averaging a little less than a point per game as a Freshman. It got to the point where I was completely depressed and actually thought about hanging up the skates before my senior year. My teammates convinced me not to and as a senior I just tried to re-focus on enjoying myself since it was going to be my last year of truly competitive hockey - and to be completely frank, if I wasn't playing a good chunk of my financial aid probably would have been pulled. Long story short, I scored twice on opening night my senior year, had 5 points the second weekend and ended up having a great senior year.

I guess the moral of the story is to just focus on enjoying playing. If you do that and play hard the rest will take care of itself.

[jds 20]

All good points. I don't actually hate hockey. I just hate how I end up feeling after games sometimes I guess. Organized games are cool because you get to experience the real thing but I absolutely love getting to shinny only to find no one else there and me having the entire sheet to myself for the hour to do whatever I want. No dicks. No missed opportunities. Just me and the ice. That is perfect. Plus, I can always get a good shot on net when it is just me :)

[nexusrage21 1]

I absolutely love getting to shinny only to find no one else there and me having the entire sheet to myself for the hour to do whatever I want. No dicks. No missed opportunities. Just me and the ice. That is perfect. Plus, I can always get a good shot on net when it is just me :)

There's an open ice session early in the morning around here that I hit up from time to time, and it's usually empty the first half hour or so, I love it.

In regards to hating hockey, I play regular pick up game with friends. We rent out the rink, split up teams in the locker room and have at it. Now, these guys want to try and put together a team, and make plans to go through practices to be good enough to play in a league (very little experience beyond myself and a few others, and just generally bad players). I respect that and I basically quit the teams I was playing on this season to help them with it.

But to this point we haven't started any practices, and to be honest I don't know if it would even help, because the majority of them don't seem to ever want to try at all. It's so frustrating sometimes.

To make matters worse, the teams are split up by the guy who fronts the money for the ice time. He balances skill level, but fills his team with the guys that he is better friends with. I seem to fall into that category, which usually leaves me on a team with all the worst culprits of laziness. Turning it into a game that just isn't fun.

It isn't a skill level thing, because the teams really are balanced as far as player ability, but it is just frustrating.

Add to that, I cannot score on one of the goalies who we play with for the life of me (and he isn't even the good goalie) and yeah, I can hate hockey sometimes.

[GoBucky 0]

It happens. Maybe you need to just take a little break or find a league with lower level players.

I understand your frustration because I started skating and playing pickup last winter, so I had the double whammy of learning to skate and learning how to play hockey with people who had been playing since they were little kids.

Just be patient with yourself, dont get too down on yourself, have fun and channel your frustration into your training, practice and games.

[mug25 2]

I'll NEVER "hate" playing hockey. Only get "frustrated" but you're definitely not alone in being upset about your level of play. I play 4 nights a week (1 league game, rest clinics and open mixture) and it's almost always after a league game that I feel like crap about the game.

In fact, after losing 0-3 tonight and not making any contribution to our offense I really don't feel like playing. But that will only last until Thursday when I go to the adult clinic. By then I'll have forgotten about the loss and will be working to improve. In saying that, maybe you should look into some good clinics/classes. You can only learn so much on your own. So as long as you're willing to take criticism, learn and develop — a good instructor/coach will help you out big time.

[tareatingrat 4]

I personally hate being in a slump. Can't stand not producing. I really don't care too much about my stats, but I'm pretty good at creating chances offensively, and if I don't do something in each game, it drives me nuts. I think I just need to feel like I'm contributing. Even in pick-up, I need to do something.

The best thing for me is to just take a break. Right now, I'm on the ice too much and bit off more than I can chew this year in terms of how often I play, but what I would normally do is just ignore hockey for a week or so. Won't visit this site, watch games, practice, look at equipment, etc. until my next ice time. By then, I'm nic-ing out and the next time I get on the ice I'm flying because I'm eager to play.

If you're frustrated with your skill level, you can try what I do: On the way to the game, pick one thing that's been bothering you and try to work on it that game. For example, if you're not scoring and you notice you've been trying to dangle too much lately, focus on getting shots off quickly and on net. Tell your teammates if you get the puck to crash the net because you're going to let it rip.

If you're on D and you're getting beat too much, make the effort to stop watching the puck and take the man, work on angling him to the side. Again, tell your D partner what you're working on so they can be ready for it.

Things like that. Pick one thing, work on that, and if you accomplish it, then you can say you've done a good job and had a good game.

Unless you're like me, where you can do everything right, not score, and feel like you had a shitty game. :P

[gxc999 7]

I kind of resent hockey now, I view it as another part of my life in which I've failed. I haven't had the time because of health issues and lost pretty much all my skill at shooting and have no speed now too. My leg strength is 75% gone and I don't ever know if I'll have the time I used to (I don't even have time to sleep now) and I don't wanna be a shitty D league player because I don't have time to play regularly. I'm seriously considering quitting for good and selling all my stuff.

[NextBobbyOrr 0]

I hated hockey for the week of my first year Bantam tryouts. I completely sucked. Nothing was going right for me. It was just way more high pace and the hitting was all really overwhelming. Nothing went right for me, i was totally negative. Even when I did something right, I thought of what it "Would've, could've or should've been". But the next year I ended up on AA/A and had a great time. Maybe that was just what I needed as a wakeup call.

[Doctor Hook 0]

Up until this past October, I took about a 1.5-year hiatus from the game (and from this site, as well) and stopped playing because it wasn't fun for me anymore.

So I delved into the world of indoor soccer in winter and outdoor soccer in spring/summer. While it was a fun experience, the camaraderie, intensity, and overall excitement of soccer is nowhere near anything I experienced playing hockey.

So I've hung up the cleats and brought out my skates and am skating in a new league that is more competitive/less goonish than my old one. It's more of a challenge, but I feel like I'm back in my element with like-minded folks who just love the game with passion.

Take a break. Find a new league/pickup hour. Hockey will always be there willing to take you back with open arms.