ugh. My glorious return between the pipes has not been very glorious. After the 4-3 loss to my best friend's team in my first game, we lost 7-1 last night. The first game was my first in a few years, so I was understandably very rusty. Nothing felt right, and I can describe my movements as "statue-like". Just bad. I was expecting some improvement for my second game, but not as much as I got. From the start of warm-ups, I felt great. All of my movements were good, I could slide well, my angles were better. I stopped all of the shots in warm-up cleanly and confidently. I know it's not a big achievement, but I thought it was significant given how off I was the game before. And then the game started. My team dominated play early, so I didn't see my first shot until halfway through the period. And from then on it was an onslaught. I made some great saves to keep us in, saves I wouldn't have made the game before. Backdoor pad saves (and a sweet blocker one on a puck that got passed out front from behind the net), no rebounds into the kill zone, saves through screens and on deflections. But through all of it, my puck tracking was a little off. So with about 2 minutes left in the period, I let a knuckleball get through me. I thought I was squeezing it between my elbow and body, but it slipped down, hit my leg, and went in. I guess I didn't track it all the way in. The second period was a nightmare. I got not much defense and let some bad ones in at the same time. Second goal was on a PP. After a flurry of saves, a puck got back to the point and I never saw it until it was going through my 5 hole. It went through 3 guys before it got to me. third goal was a guy coming at an angle from the circle after beating my dman wide (we play on Olympic ice). I may have been off my angle a little and the guy put it far side under the bar. I got a piece of it with my glove, so I'm upset I didn't get more as i was a little deep in my crease. But it was a pretty nice shot. 4th was a 2-1 that my defender didn't play either guy. The puck carrier came all the way in with a good shooting angle, so I had to stay square with him. He passed the puck before killing his shooting angle back up higher out. It was a soft pass out of my reach, so I couldn't drive hard to the far post because the guy would have had a chance to settle the puck and cut back. 5th goal was a pass from behind the net into the crease that got tucked 5 hole. I played it poorly and was still standing instead of going to RVH. I tried to get a stick on the pass, but once it got through me, I had no chance. If I were down in the RVh, I may have had more coverage against the pass and would have been down to make a blocking save on the shot. Too easy for them. 6th my defenseman kept backing in and just let the guy walk into the slot, cut across, and shoot. He put it against the grain as I moved across with him. I stil should have had it. That's how the second period ended, with us down 6-0. We scored on the PP to keep the clock from running. But then they scored with about 5 to go on another 2-1. This time I got across and made the save, but just like the first goal the puck trickled through me and the other guy put in the loose puck behind me. Overall, I felt like I played better and actually looked like I had played goal before. But my puck tracking just isn't there. Other than the ones that went in, I had 3 or 4 more that squeezed through me and didn't. It's a frustrating start for sure. My team was upset with themselves for "leaving me out to dry". Even though there wasn't much that I could have done to make a difference in the outcome (we only scored 1 goal), I was still upset with myself for the goals and shots that got through me. The progress is encouraging and I know I can and will be better. I just have to remember to keep my eyes on the puck, which is the opposite of what I do as a defenseman. I'm still happy to be back in net.