The Venting Spot

[Chadd 916]

Hard to believe that it has been three months. Sometimes it seems like forever, other times it seems like yesterday. I still almost expect her to walk through the door and this to all be a bad dream.

[noodle3872 40]

Hard to believe that it has been three months. Sometimes it seems like forever, other times it seems like yesterday. I still almost expect her to walk through the door and this to all be a bad dream.

I feel ya on this one! It's been 1.5 months since my Dad passed and it feel surreal as well.

[MThockeydad 469]

Hard to believe that it has been three months. Sometimes it seems like forever, other times it seems like yesterday. I still almost expect her to walk through the door and this to all be a bad dream.

You're in my thoughts.

[badger_14 601]

Pretty ticked at one of the local hospitals after tonight's fiasco. Utter negligence on their part, signing off on the discharge of a patient who absolutely should not have been discharged - altered mental status, didn't know his address, no one seemed to know his address, no next of kin, no shoes, and their original plan was to send him walking out the door with his bag, his cane, and bus fare. It's 12F out right now. Somehow, someone noticed his lack of footwear, and called our company for a chair car, but as no chair car was available, we got the call, which is probably a damn good thing, since our patient is now back at the hospital and hopefully staying there until someone competent figures out a plan for him.

Edited January 5, 2016 by badger_14

[MThockeydad 469]

One of the girls on the 14U team I manage and assistant coach is now completely out for the season due to a bad concussion (occurred 2 months ago).

Here's the heartbreaking text I got from her last night:

"I am very sorry but I won't be able to play hockey for the rest of the year. I wish I could it is really fun especially when u have a great coach like u. I went to the neurologist and he said that I have a moderate concussion and that some of my wires to my brain cells broke off when I hit my head and the wires started decomposing and giving off toxins which went into the liquid that my brain is floating in and killed my neurons also when the wires broke off it killed those cells also. I am so sorry we will bring the jersey back soon."

Super sweet kid...she was never really engaged playing mites/squirts, took a year or two off, then really connected with our group of girls this year and started playing solid and loving hockey. Its put a lump in my throat all day, and I can only imagine how she and her parents feel. I hate it when kids hurt.

Please send up a prayer or good vibes on her behalf that she gets well, not for hockey, but for her life and well-being.

Fellow hockey players and parents: life is short and hockey is awesome--broken bones heal and we can live without a tooth or two--but please keep your head off the ice and out of the boards.

Play hard, and respect your opponents' brains, too. We only get one.

[EJB 488]

Sending positive JuJu to you Chad and to your player, MThockeydad.

[GreatestAmericanBeardo 258]

One of the girls on the 14U team I manage and assistant coach is now completely out for the season due to a bad concussion (occurred 2 months ago).

Here's the heartbreaking text I got from her last night:

"I am very sorry but I won't be able to play hockey for the rest of the year. I wish I could it is really fun especially when u have a great coach like u. I went to the neurologist and he said that I have a moderate concussion and that some of my wires to my brain cells broke off when I hit my head and the wires started decomposing and giving off toxins which went into the liquid that my brain is floating in and killed my neurons also when the wires broke off it killed those cells also. I am so sorry we will bring the jersey back soon."

Super sweet kid...she was never really engaged playing mites/squirts, took a year or two off, then really connected with our group of girls this year and started playing solid and loving hockey. Its put a lump in my throat all day, and I can only imagine how she and her parents feel. I hate it when kids hurt.

Please send up a prayer or good vibes on her behalf that she gets well, not for hockey, but for her life and well-being.

Fellow hockey players and parents: life is short and hockey is awesome--broken bones heal and we can live without a tooth or two--but please keep your head off the ice and out of the boards.

Play hard, and respect your opponents' brains, too. We only get one.

MT, when i saw you were posting HERE in the venting spot, i knew it couldn't be good. Everything i've read from your posts has been super positive.

My prayers go out to her, her family, you and her team mates. I hope the road ahead is not as bumpy as it sounds right now.

and um, i hope you let her keep the jersey.

Fellow hockey players and parents: life is short and hockey is awesome--broken bones heal and we can live without a tooth or two--but please keep your head off the ice and out of the boards.

Play hard, and respect your opponents' brains, too. We only get one.

[MThockeydad 469]

My prayers go out to her, her family, you and her team mates. I hope the road ahead is not as bumpy as it sounds right now.

Ever read "Confessions of a Crazy Hockey Parent" by Bob McKenzie?

I happen to be re-reading it right now and am in the chapter where his youngest son sustains a career-ending concussion. I have to admit I saw too much of a parallel. I truly hope that her road ahead isn't bumpy for the long-term. I'm less worried about her hockey career and far more worried about her life and long-term well-being. Physically and emotionally.

and um, i hope you let her keep the jersey.

I am really glad you said that. I hadn't even considered it.

I posted to get the situation off my chest, but the best suggestions come from unexpected places.

I'm short on jerseys and its a pain to get a single one printed...but in the big picture, letting her keep it is so much the right thing to do. Thank you, my friend.

Edited January 7, 2016 by MThockeydad

[badger_14 601]

One of the girls on the 14U team I manage and assistant coach is now completely out for the season due to a bad concussion (occurred 2 months ago).

Here's the heartbreaking text I got from her last night:

"I am very sorry but I won't be able to play hockey for the rest of the year. I wish I could it is really fun especially when u have a great coach like u. I went to the neurologist and he said that I have a moderate concussion and that some of my wires to my brain cells broke off when I hit my head and the wires started decomposing and giving off toxins which went into the liquid that my brain is floating in and killed my neurons also when the wires broke off it killed those cells also. I am so sorry we will bring the jersey back soon."

Super sweet kid...she was never really engaged playing mites/squirts, took a year or two off, then really connected with our group of girls this year and started playing solid and loving hockey. Its put a lump in my throat all day, and I can only imagine how she and her parents feel. I hate it when kids hurt.

Please send up a prayer or good vibes on her behalf that she gets well, not for hockey, but for her life and well-being.

Fellow hockey players and parents: life is short and hockey is awesome--broken bones heal and we can live without a tooth or two--but please keep your head off the ice and out of the boards.

Play hard, and respect your opponents' brains, too. We only get one.

So sorry to hear about your player ... that's rough, poor kiddo. Hopefully, like Beardo says, the road is not so bumpy as it appears now. Good luck to her.

[mojo122 535]

I'm short on jerseys and its a pain to get a single one printed...but in the big picture, letting her keep it is so much the right thing to do. Thank you, my friend.

An outstanding act on your behalf that she will surely appreciate...well done!

[MThockeydad 469]

Credit due to GreatestAmericanBeardo for the idea.

[GreatestAmericanBeardo 258]

Ever read "Confessions of a Crazy Hockey Parent" by Bob McKenzie?

I'm short on jerseys and its a pain to get a single one printed...but in the big picture, letting her keep it is so much the right thing to do. Thank you, my friend.

BOB MCKENZIE??? you mean this hoser?

http://www.thingamababy.com/photos/uncategorized/bobmckenzie.jpg

i have not read it, but i may have to pick it up, so i dont become that guy (like my brother is)

im sure if you set something up, the MSH group would chip in to get you a new jersey. ;)

[kovalchuk71 212]

I am absolutely fuming right now. I was reffing a bronze beer league game (the worst players) and was being berated the entire game by one team (lets call them the asshats). According to them, every call was wrong.

So, with 3:00 or so left in the 3rd period, the other team scores to tie the game. A player on the asshats takes the puck out of the net and flings it down the rink while saying "Theres a souvenir for you" (directed at me). I call him for unsportsmanlike conduct and he proceeds to look at me like I shot his dog. For some reason, he couldn't comprehend why I called him for a penalty. As he's skating to the box I get a "Fuck you", so I toss him. He's still jawing at me as he's leaving (whatever), but of course another player on the asshats bench decides he wants to start berating me as well. At this point I've had it. After the next "go fuck yourself" (while getting simultaneously flicked off) I toss him straight from the bench. I've never seen a group of adult men act like such animals. Pure disrespect.

The other team ended up winning in OT (they had a PP for the entire time). I just finished sending an email to the hockey coordinator telling him that I'm finished reffing adult league games. I don't get paid enough to put up with this BS.

/rant

[x-axis 44]

I am absolutely fuming right now. I was reffing a bronze beer league game (the worst players) and was being berated the entire game by one team (lets call them the asshats). According to them, every call was wrong.

So, with 3:00 or so left in the 3rd period, the other team scores to tie the game. A player on the asshats takes the puck out of the net and flings it down the rink while saying "Theres a souvenir for you" (directed at me). I call him for unsportsmanlike conduct and he proceeds to look at me like I shot his dog. For some reason, he couldn't comprehend why I called him for a penalty. As he's skating to the box I get a "Fuck you", so I toss him. He's still jawing at me as he's leaving (whatever), but of course another player on the asshats bench decides he wants to start berating me as well. At this point I've had it. After the next "go fuck yourself" (while getting simultaneously flicked off) I toss him straight from the bench. I've never seen a group of adult men act like such animals. Pure disrespect.

The other team ended up winning in OT (they had a PP for the entire time). I just finished sending an email to the hockey coordinator telling him that I'm finished reffing adult league games. I don't get paid enough to put up with this BS.

/rant

I feel for you. I don't understand why beginners take hockey so seriously.

[Hills 712]

I feel for you. I don't understand why beginners take hockey so seriously.

Or adults in general.

[Chadd 916]

I am absolutely fuming right now. I was reffing a bronze beer league game (the worst players) and was being berated the entire game by one team (lets call them the asshats). According to them, every call was wrong.

So, with 3:00 or so left in the 3rd period, the other team scores to tie the game. A player on the asshats takes the puck out of the net and flings it down the rink while saying "Theres a souvenir for you" (directed at me). I call him for unsportsmanlike conduct and he proceeds to look at me like I shot his dog. For some reason, he couldn't comprehend why I called him for a penalty. As he's skating to the box I get a "Fuck you", so I toss him. He's still jawing at me as he's leaving (whatever), but of course another player on the asshats bench decides he wants to start berating me as well. At this point I've had it. After the next "go fuck yourself" (while getting simultaneously flicked off) I toss him straight from the bench. I've never seen a group of adult men act like such animals. Pure disrespect.

The other team ended up winning in OT (they had a PP for the entire time). I just finished sending an email to the hockey coordinator telling him that I'm finished reffing adult league games. I don't get paid enough to put up with this BS.

/rant

There are always those teams and players that make you regret taking game assignments. For me, it was the parents and coaches that didn't know the rules and would tell kids that they did nothing wrong after the kids took penalties on dangerous plays. At least with the adult games, you can directly toss out the offenders for swearing at you, with youth hockey you would have to clear the stands to do that. There were adult teams that I refused to work after a while, just because I knew how they reacted to any call against them. Like anything in life, you should never make a "never doing that again" decision in the heat of the moment.

[chippa13 1844]

I am absolutely fuming right now. I was reffing a bronze beer league game (the worst players) and was being berated the entire game by one team (lets call them the asshats). According to them, every call was wrong.

So, with 3:00 or so left in the 3rd period, the other team scores to tie the game. A player on the asshats takes the puck out of the net and flings it down the rink while saying "Theres a souvenir for you" (directed at me). I call him for unsportsmanlike conduct and he proceeds to look at me like I shot his dog. For some reason, he couldn't comprehend why I called him for a penalty. As he's skating to the box I get a "Fuck you", so I toss him. He's still jawing at me as he's leaving (whatever), but of course another player on the asshats bench decides he wants to start berating me as well. At this point I've had it. After the next "go fuck yourself" (while getting simultaneously flicked off) I toss him straight from the bench. I've never seen a group of adult men act like such animals. Pure disrespect.

The other team ended up winning in OT (they had a PP for the entire time). I just finished sending an email to the hockey coordinator telling him that I'm finished reffing adult league games. I don't get paid enough to put up with this BS.

/rant

Since you say the team was all over you the whole game, it might be a good idea the next time to try and settle them down earlier. Pull their captain aside and let him know what's what in a calm and clear manner. Of course, there are some teams that will never settle and you just have to climb the ladder on one or two of them before they finally get the hint.

[kovalchuk71 212]

Since you say the team was all over you the whole game, it might be a good idea the next time to try and settle them down earlier. Pull their captain aside and let him know what's what in a calm and clear manner. Of course, there are some teams that will never settle and you just have to climb the ladder on one or two of them before they finally get the hint.

This is one of those teams that will never settle. I attempted that earlier in the game. You are always wrong when you ref their games. It's never a good game to ref, but I've never seen them that out of hand.

[Chadd 916]

This is one of those teams that will never settle. I attempted that earlier in the game. You are always wrong when you ref their games. It's never a good game to ref, but I've never seen them that out of hand.

The only way to win there is to not take those games

[chippa13 1844]

This is one of those teams that will never settle. I attempted that earlier in the game. You are always wrong when you ref their games. It's never a good game to ref, but I've never seen them that out of hand.

In that case, if you get that team again then grab the captain before the game and let him know that you shouldn't have to and will not tolerate the events of the last game again. That way when you sent the first guy off early in the game they'll know that you mean business and should learn their lesson. Sometimes as refs we can be our own worst enemies when we shrug off too much stuff early in a game. Set the standard early in the game and be consistent. If that doesn't work then they can enjoy the parade.

[Chadd 916]

In that case, if you get that team again then grab the captain before the game and let him know that you shouldn't have to and will not tolerate the events of the last game again. That way when you sent the first guy off early in the game they'll know that you mean business and should learn their lesson. Sometimes as refs we can be our own worst enemies when we shrug off too much stuff early in a game. Set the standard early in the game and be consistent. If that doesn't work then they can enjoy the parade.

Around here, saying something like that before the game will turn into "you were out to get us" before you even drop the puck. I used to tell both captains before a game that I tended to call the game tight but I would be happy to answer any question that didn't start out "what the F...?" but it wouldn't be a discussion. If they wanted to do that, we could do it between periods.

[chippa13 1844]

They can't say that you were out to get them if you set the ground rules before the game and let them know what the standard will be. If you don't tell the captain anything before the game and just call it at a stricter standard than the previous game then they will have a beef.

[Chadd 916]

They can't say that you were out to get them if you set the ground rules before the game and let them know what the standard will be. If you don't tell the captain anything before the game and just call it at a stricter standard than the previous game then they will have a beef.

We have obviously not had the same experiences in beer league hockey. The teams that act like he has described in my area are full of guys looking for any reason to complain. Referring to past behavior would absolutely guarantee complaints before you even drop the puck and around here it would mean a phone call within a couple days, maybe even a written report. I'm all for setting ground rules, and would be up front about the previous game with my partner in the locker room, but there is no way that I would reference the previous game or the standard used at that time. Just off the top of my head, there are at least half a dozen themes that certain guys and teams would use throughout the game.

[McDougalfaschnitzer 32]

Broke my collarbone on tuesday due to a blindside open ice hit before I touched the puck. Sucks.

[chippa13 1844]

We have obviously not had the same experiences in beer league hockey. The teams that act like he has described in my area are full of guys looking for any reason to complain. Referring to past behavior would absolutely guarantee complaints before you even drop the puck and around here it would mean a phone call within a couple days, maybe even a written report. I'm all for setting ground rules, and would be up front about the previous game with my partner in the locker room, but there is no way that I would reference the previous game or the standard used at that time. Just off the top of my head, there are at least half a dozen themes that certain guys and teams would use throughout the game.

The leagues I've done here, the captain would have heard from the league after having a couple of guys run off for abusing the refs. Also, getting a game misconduct for that offense comes with an automatic game or two.

It helps when the league will back up the refs.

Edited January 16, 2016 by chippa13